The Masochist

“The only path to true happiness is: Never go through other people's personal things. You never know what you find in there. It may just ruin everything you have. Ignorance is bliss”, read the advice. It is then she picked up his phone, went through his inbox and cried herself to sleep. 

image: deviantart

We all want fridays to pass in a flash. If in your attempt to reach the weekends sooner you write a Friday Flash 55, share it with the G-Man

mea máxima culpa

It rained today. A lot. I sat in my room and got to thinking about the things I've done and the things I plan to do in the years ahead. Suddenly my thoughts were clouded by a memory, which now seems very distant, almost as if it never happened.

I killed Nadia Joseph. Calling the authorities will be pointless. They won't find anything. I've spent years thinking over every detail.

I can still see it vividly-  breathing her last few, painful, breaths. Her eyes look so un-Nadia- like. Cold, dim, fixed on a distant vision of the forgotten past-on a regret.

We were seven when we first met- Nadia and I. I knew then that one day she would die and that it would be me who would kill her. Her family had moved in into the next apartment. I was on the swing trying to touch the leaves of the low branch hanging over the swing with my feet.  Nadia, wearing a yellow bib dress and flip flops runs down with her locks flowing like a cape behind her. Without a word, she grabs my arm, pulls me off the swing, sits on the swing and swings higher and higher in a mysterious bliss, which I was not a part of. I stared at her, dumbfounded. She tossed back her hair, flashed the first of many gorgeous smiles I’d learn to loathe, and went higher with her toes stretched to touch the wet leaves I had set my eyes on.

I began to plot her death.  I thought it noble and poetic to use my own bare hands, the very ones she grabbed that day and fixed the venue in the park by the swing. It was months later when I actually made an attempt. It was late evening and we were playing in the park. She was excitedly talking about the presents she got for her birthday last night. I could not bear the ring in her voice, the aura around her and that wretched incredible smile. 

Without much conscious efforts, I pushed her hard from the back. She fell, face down. I ran quickly and smothered her face harder into the soil. Her socked feet  flailing, and hands trying to grab on to something- maybe to life- encouraged me. A few moments passed, she went limp. I turned her around. She lay there with her dress muddy and her face smeared with dirt.  I cleaned her face. It was beautiful. Ran my fingers over her brows and kissed her forehead.

I could have sworn she smiled.

The Castle of Crossed Destinies

Wayanad, Kerela

 (I know)

Wings, I gave up

To hide in the web 

Which keeps me tangled, sad, content.

*

(Therefore I am)


We walked tipsy, intoxicated, mildly happy
Exchanged numbers, smiles, a few dance moves and secrets.
Betraying the web, seething to strangle the last smiles out of the beautiful slurring lips.

*

p.s.: 1)This Post is being written for THE POETRY CONTEST at Blogjunta.com as a part of WOMEN & BLOGGING month

2)shared with Haiku Heights prompt #34
3) A special thanks to the photographer, Naveen for the beautiful picture. 

I sing to ME

Woke up groggy from sleep. It took a moment for me figure out where i am.I was on the sofa having fallen asleep watching TV last night. The cushions didn't do good for my neck. Could hear mom shouting at my brother for 'sleeping like a bum when u should be half buried in ur books'. It felt too distant, like i was just a ghost, other-worldly, unattached and an unwilling observer to the events taking place.

Washed my face, my eyes stuck to the image I could see in the mirror. 'Its me', I thought.

Then i sang(i did mention that I sing terribly in my last blog post, didn't I?) this funk-rap ballad to 'Me'

'Y do u follow me so...[B***H]

(chorus)ahh yeah

Its not always about ME s'times its about 'me' too...

YouknowhatI'msayin?

(chorus)[B***H] 

U never let me be alone [B***H] 

Follow me to every movie I go to,

followin' me to my classes

to my sleep

to my bad, to my good times

followin' me even to my solitude

(chorus)Ahh yeauuh!!

I never had a moment to myself, how i wish I could

(chorus)Dawg ahh ha

Witness me holla at a hoochie, even in a bloody dream!!

leave me alone, Ma head screams out 

It's just my luck I'm stuck with f**kin ME all the time, uh!