Friday, December 11

Relationships with 'potential'

All relationships(especially the 'serious' ones),and by that I mean all (that includes the ones with friends, family, the 'love of your life', the crushes, the hot-guy-whom-u-pass-everyday-and-go-'ooooo', pets, favourite comic book, favourite celebrity et al), have a 'rosy' peiod, when everything seems to be unearthly, blissful and something that , it might seem then , has the potential to keep one happy throughout one's life- even if this be the only thing that one has to live with/for.

This period lasts for precisely one day.

The next day, it all changes.We keep believing that everything is as blissful as, gripping, as spontaneous, as pure as it had been the very first day.But the fact is IT AIN'T.

From the very next day comes in games,politics and power play(not all the gray shades and in the the degrees might vary).It all boils down to questions and answers: [Should I do this?, Will this work? how do I?] I'd heard it being said in some movie, "the power in any relationship lies with the person who cares less." And power is something that all of us seems to be driven by.After all the whole of human history is the outcome of the shifts of power from one man to another. So coming back to the topic, steps are planned and executed to keep this 'special thing' going forever. But what one doesn't realize is that by the time one reaches this stage, the 'special thing' has already passed.That no effort, no much-thought-about-plan-of-action would ever be able to, sadly, make it what it was.The innocence, the purity, the extreme of bonding that happens has happened and passed, that the state that one craves for perennially is a state that is eternally momentary.

So the only thing to do, I've suddenly been hit by it this morning in sleep, is that one should (ideally, but we hardly live our lives keeping in tune with the 'ideal') put a stop to any such relationship while one is still  able to see the 'rosy' tinge...a stop as soon as the practicalities and the greed for more start to creep in, before the complexities start.

We might feel the loss of something that had 'potential' for something great, but truly speaking that 'potential' never would have , in most cases, turned 'kinetic', and more so might have been the source of something more painful than the pain of loss.

So here's a cheer to all the expiry dates that I'd see in the future, I'd probably sulk, and shed a tear for many, but then I'd come back to read this post and come to see (again!) the wisdom in the wise ass post that I am typing in, in such a hurry.

until later.
:D

7 comments:

Palashpriya said...

oops...a similar idea just popped in my mind 2 dayz back...n had been lingering in my mind since then...waiting to be jotted down...well,till then...am just gonna giv u an outline of my first post (to be)..."it wud b wise 4 us to choose to stop feeling - instesd of waiting till we r xhausted of all feelings...before one is dead from inside...and numb..."

Pesto Sauce said...

Last night I was chatting with an ex-colleague with whom I was very close and emotionally connected. After few pleasantries I did not know what to talk....perhaps expiry date was over

Its same with blogs also. Some blogs dazzle with their posts initially but become mundane later on

anwesha said...

for me the solution would rather be to stop trying so hard...and let it flow on its own...

Anonymous said...

I was not looking for a solution nor is it only a personal experience.i am just stating the universal obvious. This is what happens...not all of it malicious. "maybe if i wear this he/she will like it better." "maybe if i say this things would fall into place." all part of the game called 'human emotion'.

abclicks said...

relationships.....wn i was in d UG clas..i used to spend more dan 4 hours in ph. with ma best frnd, nw a days she s nt evn takin ma cals, and she s answerin just lik i havn't seen d ph. or sum shits.....i knw she s nt tellin d truth...
evn if she has sum prblms, she shud tel dat thing ,na?
may b bcz of ma over concern...
aftr dat...evn i slight change in d face of othr frndzz put me n tension....

i don knw hw to manage relationships...

Oblivion said...

Well, m a novice at relationships - nt bcoz of the lack of them, bt due to my inability to come to a universal solution to varied relations, which "wise asses" will gather, hasn worked. But, the "try,try, til u make others buy" is instilled! Well, for starters, lets tk the author's point of view. She says, the first day is perfect. Nw, lets look at wat mks it special. The spark, whr duz it come frm? Y dont we stop to think dat we liked sumthin, so fell for it/him/her? And thats it. As long as the likes outweigh the dislikes, we shouldnt wish to look elswhere and start the exercise once more. Lets finally acknwldge dt nobody's perfect. And plz don gimme dt "I'm nobody then". So, hang on folks, there's nthn wrong in tryn to woo the other, as long as the other ndrstnds dt smwhr, dwn da line, u go out of ur way to act to his/her likings. When u want to leave a person/thing, think twice. Are u living a lie, or do u, inspite of his/her vices, fall for him/her? If u r sane, dt very hesitance shud b enuf to reinstill ur belief in him/her. Have a happy life!

- either i seem to be a authority on relationships by nw, or we need to redefine the term "wise ass" ;)

Amropali said...

Well, m a novice at relationships - nt bcoz of the lack of them, bt due to my inability to come to a universal solution to varied relations, which "wise asses" will gather, hasn worked. But, the "try,try, til u make others buy" is instilled! Well, for starters, lets tk the author's point of view. She says, the first day is perfect. Nw, lets look at wat mks it special. The spark, whr duz it come frm? Y dont we stop to think dat we liked sumthin, so fell for it/him/her? And thats it. As long as the likes outweigh the dislikes, we shouldnt wish to look elswhere and start the exercise once more. Lets finally acknwldge dt nobody's perfect. And plz don gimme dt "I'm nobody then". So, hang on folks, there's nthn wrong in tryn to woo the other, as long as the other ndrstnds dt smwhr, dwn da line, u go out of ur way to act to his/her likings. When u want to leave a person/thing, think twice. Are u living a lie, or do u, inspite of his/her vices, fall for him/her? If u r sane, dt very hesitance shud b enuf to reinstill ur belief in him/her. Have a happy life!

- either i seem to be a authority on relationships by nw, or we need to redefine the term "wise ass" ;)